?Settled identity produces a settled life, and middle schoolers learn stability by hearing it, noticing it, and practicing it with us. Welcome to the Faith Mom Mentor, the podcast for moms who want more than surface level faith for themselves and their kids. I'm Anne, and if you're a mom who feels unsure where to start, spiritually worries.
You're not teaching your kids enough and wants a calmer, more confident faith at home. You are in the right place here. We cut through the noise and get grounded in truth. Each episode helps you know. God deeply teach your tween faithfully and build a home that feels strong, steady, and Christ-centered even in the middle school years.
If you are ready to stop guessing, start leading with confidence and grow a faith, your family can actually live out your end the right place. Welcome to the Faith Mom Mentor. Your child needs to hear what is actually happening inside of them because they don't understand and they can't experience real stability in their identity without being taught.
Many middle schoolers are reacting, snapping, withdrawing, or exploding, not because they are bad, but because something inside of them feels unsatisfied. And unsettled. So today I want to give you words, simple, audible words to help your child understand what's happening inside their mind and how to live with a stable identity.
The first thing your child needs to hear is the balloon popping the pop of a balloon. And you may want to warn them first if they are easily startled by sounds. After you pop the balloon, ask them what did you hear? What happened to the balloon? And let them answer. And then you can help them understand that big pop was all the air coming out.
And then you can ask them, have you ever screamed out of anger or frustration? And then say. Do you know what that was when you were screaming out of anger or frustration? That is your thoughts coming out. It's what's happening in your mind. It's coming out, and that outbursts of anger is your mind that is just exploding because it's not able to hold itself together.
There is another sound you can help your child hear, not just words. But tone. You may ask them something like, have you ever heard someone talk in a snobby tone and ask them to describe it? Explain something like elevated talk or loudness. Public words like, did you see what she wore? Or, I can't believe he did that.
Then gently say, all those statements carry malice judgment in comparison. That comparison usually doesn't have all the details and doesn't see the full picture. So you can gently say you, when you say things like that, you really don't know what's happened before or what the person's carrying. We really don't see the whole picture and sometimes we can't.
And you can also ask your middle schooler, have you ever thought you were right and later realized you were wrong? And then explain. But often we're sure. Until we aren't, and that's why perspective matters in seeing the full picture. Before we go further, let me gently invite you if you want more faith-based tools like this, practical ways to help your middle schooler grow with confidence, strength, and stability.
You can visit Life and Peace ministries.com where everything we share is designed to help. Moms and tweens navigate the middle school years grounded in truth and peace. Now let's keep going. Let's talk about one more sound to discuss with your middle schooler when we're talking about stabilizing their identity.
You can ask them what does it sound like when someone wants to pick up something that's too heavy and let them answer their list may include like a strain or grunts or puffing or, um, holding their breath or out of breath. That's what it sounds like when someone is carrying too much. So once you discuss these three sounds, you can help them understand by saying all of these sounds matter.
A balloon that's bursting a snobby comparison, heavy lifting noises, and here's the explanation. They all tell us something is unsatisfied. When your identity is unstable, your reactions are loud, your identity is leaking out. When you don't see the full picture, the comparison you made, tween is usually not accurate and then you feel bad.
When you try to pick up things that aren't yours to carry, middle schooler, the things leave you unstable and out of breath, and now say clearly to that middle schooler. I want you to hear the opposite sound. What would the opposite sound of a balloon pop be? And maybe let them think about it and maybe. I asked them what it was like when they had a balloon, when they were young and it didn't pop.
What did they do with it? They had happy sounds. They were playing with it joyful. They were laughing. Playing with the balloon was fun. What would a conversation. That sees the whole perspective sound like instead of that conversation that you said something and then later found out that wasn't the full story and then felt bad about what you had said, what would it sound like to do the opposite?
It would sound like peace and agreement. And then thirdly, what is the opposite of sounds when you're trying to carry too much? What's the opposite kind of sound to that? It's actually calm and pleasantness and even breathing. And then you can ask, what does a young child sound like when they're content to be with their mother?
And you can pause, you can maybe talk about a child that you know that the, that your middle schooler is familiar with, and talk specifically about that child and talk about the sounds that child makes when they're with their mother. Those sounds are happy, quiet, calm. And then after you give these lessons that help your middle schooler hear the sound of an unstable identity, and then hear the sound of a stable identity, have them read and you read with them.
Psalm 1 31, Psalm 1 31 tells us what. The outcome would be of a stable identity. So read it slowly. Um, you could even listen together using an audio bible or follow along with the written word, and then you can say. Just like a baby who is quiet and settled with their mother, that's what a stable identity sounds like.
It sounds like peace. It sounds like calm, it sounds like satisfaction. It sounds like being pleased. And you can help them further by saying, when we don't pop, when we don't compare, when we don't grunt under the weight, when we breathe smoothly. The opposite of popping comparison and heavyweight is a calm breath.
And how do we sound? And then you can talk to your middle schooler about how they sound. With this teaching your middle schooler learns the way a stable identity sounds and learns what it takes to have a stable identity. Stability comes from knowing what you believe. When your identity is settled, your sound is settled, and when your sound is settled, your life follows.
Mom, you can teach this to your child. You don't need perfect words. You need fateful presence. Your child is learning not just from what you say, but from how you sound when life gets heavy. And every calm breath you take teaches your child how to live with a stable identity and your steady voice is shaping their future.
Before you go, remember this, you are doing sacred work as you nurture faith in your home and it matters more than you realize. Thank you for choosing to spend this time growing stronger and steadier in truth. If today helped you take one more step forward. Head to life and peace ministries.com for simple faith.
Field resources designed to support you as you know God deeply, and teach your tween faithfully, including faith, mom, t-shirts, and ways to connect for speaking and faith mentoring. You can also help another mom by following the show, leaving a quick review or sharing this episode with somebody who needs encouragement right now.
Until next time, keep leading with faith. Your faithfulness is shaping a legacy.
